|
0 registered (),
511
Guests and
3
Spiders online. |
|
Key:
Admin,
Global Mod,
Mod
|
|
30766 Members
78 Forums
19420 Topics
187049 Posts
Max Online: 13248 @ 04/08/26 07:59 AM
|
|
|
#103817 - 10/20/07 10:21 AM
Re: [CONTAINS SPOILERS] Strange things villagers do
[Re: laurence]
|
Master of Meditation
Registered: 09/13/06
Posts: 4896
Loc: London, UK
|
That reminds me of a song.
Funeral Directors of America, I am very deeply honored standing here; Receiving this token of your esteem, "The Funeral Director of the Year." Now I've been asked by all the delegates - and members of the board, To tell you of the funeral that won me this award. It was handled with taste and dignity, that much I can say for it; And I'm sure it will take the family ... twenty YEARS to pay for it!
It was a hell of a funeral; it was a hell of a funeral The finest funeral ever booked: I had some high school juniors who passed around petunias And lilies everywhere you looked. It was a hell of a funeral; I say one hell of a funeral Oh, how I wish that you were there; I had ten drum majorettes doubling on the castanets It really was a lively affair
It was a hell of a funeral; it was a hell of a funeral The National Guard showed up for me; And during the oration, they went into formation And formed the letters R. I. P. It was a hell of a funeral; I say one hell of a funeral I gave it all my loving care; The band was on its toes playing "Mexicali Rose", It really was a lively affair.
(A tisket, a tasket, Tell us about the casket.)
Well, I'll tell you about the casket, my good friends It would’ve made your poor eyes pop It was sterling silver all around and a real Formica top. (Formica top, it had a Formica top).
Well, I'll tell you about the widow, my good friends, The widow was in navy blue With a gown designed by Balenciaga, I supplied that too. (He sold the widow widow's weeds too).
I held the first funereal raffle, though I don't much like to boast And I gave away a Chevrolet to the person who cried the most. (He gave away a brand new Chevrolet). I won it myself!
There were eighteen jugglers by the grave to demonstrate their art And when they were done, I fired a gun to let the hootenanny start. (He fired a gun and the hoot-e-nanny begun).
I was serving beer and pretzels, ‘til the hot pastrami came; And I sold some souvenir hankies with the dear departed’s name. (He was sellin’ hankies with the dear departed's name).
As a fitting finale we had the Rockettes from New York's Music Hall; As you can see, my very good friends All in all, all in all, all in all:
It was a hell of a funeral; I say one hell of a funeral No other burial could compare; It was all done up deluxe and I made forty thousand bucks, It really was a lively affair. It really was a swingin' affair.
_________________________
To err is human; to arr is pirate.
|
|
Top
|
|
|
|
|
|